All ladies love babies, Toastmaster General.

I can't believe that I haven't done this yet. Above you shall notice the picture of a rather small child. Who is this baby and what is it doing getting in the way of Friday afternoon hilarity here at Toastedblog. Well, that child is my nephew, Baby Zima, or Callan Richard Zima if you're not into that whole brevity thing; and the reason he is here is that I am all sorts of doing stuff of late and haven't had time to spin out something awesome for y'alls reading pleasure. Doing work, that's insane.

Baby Zima was born a little over a month ago and from what I hear he's already rolling over. I guess that's a big deal for the little ones. Anywho, Uncle Toast has undertaken the monumentous task of making sure the son of my Irish twin sister becomes a dinosaur nut. I can't make him into a fan of every sports team that I love, that's his father's job but, what I can do is stuff enough dinosaur themed clothing, stuffed brontosaurus, and fossil building kits down this buck-a-roo's throat that he is forced to love them as much as I did when I was a kid. Yup, with a little bit of effort and elbow grease, there is no limit to this little guy's potential.

The following is a list of how to's, random bits of knowledge, and life lessons that Uncle Toast will pass unto Baby Zima:

- Properly eat chicken wings.
- Be a hit with the ladies. (Just act goofy and be yourself, it's amazing how they respond)
- Why McDonald's is only good for their Egg McMuffin's
- Effectively shotgun a beer
- The importance of having a good backhand while playing ice hockey
- How to tackle a man up to twice your size
- Never ever drink beer on an empty stomach
- Stick to your guns
- Make sure to read, alot. Being smart has it's advantages
- Never be afraid to dance
- It doesn't matter how you play the game, it's whether you win or lose. And even that doesn't make all that much difference.
- Always loosen the bolts on a tire before you jack up the car
- Eating a burrito before sex is always a bad idea
- Desperation is a stinky cologne
- Don't worry about getting hurt while playing sports, when you play afraid, that's when injuries happen.
- Fried chicken is delicious
- There are two types of people in this world: Those who like Neil Diamond, and those who don't
- Never get less than 12 hours of sleep
- Never play cards with a man who has the same first name as a city
- Never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body

You stick with me kid, the rest is cream cheese.

Huey Lewis and the Foo's!

This was recently sent to me from my good pal Uncle Jitter who, needless to say, knows that it's hip to be square. Uncle Huey. The Foo Fighters. That's nothing short of the jackpot right there. Fancy Plays all around!!



But why stop there when the Toast is all in the mood for the News. It's just too damn sweet for words.


"Heart and Soul" (a personal Toast favorite)



"It's Hip to Be Square"

Oh Huey Lewis, you're just too Van Damme awesome.

Yeah...we're not really doing work here today either.

So the Toast has triumphantly returned to blogging after a few days away from the office, home, and having his cell phone turned on. It's back to all sorts of normalcy here in the District and rumor has it, the Toast kinda wishes he was still at the beach. But I didn't tell you that, you must'a heard that one somewhere else. Anywho, Toastedblog here will feature a quick rundown of events of the holiday weekend when I have more time to be witty and creative. Plus, I needs a few minutes to upload sweet sweet pics of the trip so you all can revel in multiple action shots of a sunburned toast running into the ocean. That's pretty much the gift that keeps on giving, the WHOLE year.

Anywho, I'm not going to leave you listless and unentertained as the Toast certainly not come here to do that. Upon receiving good news from a certain fellow blogger out there on the national interweb, I took part in a request of answering a few questions, 8 times as a matter of fact. A special bonus to you internet readers, I actually answered these in a somewhat serious manner as apposed to being completely goofy and full of nonsense. That being all thrown out at you, enjoy the read and we'll catch you on the flip flop.

8 Things I am passionate about:

- Rocking: I love music. I love going to see shows. I love finding out about new shit to check out and give a listen to. I like giving garbage music a shot and then never giving it another go. I love rocking out to Pearl Jam over and over again. I love suggesting different albums to my friends so that they'll check 'em out and maybe enjoy them as much as I do. I love getting the same in return.

- Sandwiches: Try to tell me that you don't enjoy a delicious sandwich. Go ahead, I'll wait.

- L-I-V-I-N: Every day I do. This kid is all about going out and trying new things.

- Being Active: It has been pointed out to me that I am indeed steadily approaching the age of thirty and I am still throwing myself under the bus week in and week out playing kickass physical sports like rugby and ice hockey. Despite the way I sometimes feel on a Sunday following a few games the day before I really don't envision myself letting up any time soon.

- My friends: A stereotypical answer I know, but if you are considered a friend of mine...get ready for a good time and some good luvin.

- Kool-Aid: Another one of those, "hmmm...that's original" answers." That being said, to hell with all of you's. Not going to get all sentimental on you but I will break off a new flava in your ear. Kool-Aid is by far the most phenomenal kick ass lady that I've ever been fortunate enough to encounter. To have her around me on a daily basis has made me feel pretty much like the tops and I can safely say that I've never had as much fun nor laughed as much with anyone. I'm always am wanting to do things with her. And get your minds out of the gutter as I'm more refering to the simple day to day things to planning adventures with her. Going to the grocery store, that counts. Touring Europe, sure when the time and money is right. To put it in words that I may have told her once or twice: she's like a female version of Charlie. (Charlie = best friend, awesome Italian, great at video games)

- Beer: What can I say, I like me a good beer. We're not talking like an alcoholic fan of beer. Just a fan of some really out there and delicious stuff.

- My Sports: I am forever a sports fan. Nothing is quite like watching your team compete with close friends in tow and a bucket of wings to share. Dem's the good times.

8 Things I want to do before I die:

- See Ireland: It's about time I went all the way back home. (clever use of accent)

- Write a children's book: I worked in an educational toy store all throughout college. My time spent there was some of the funniest this kid has ever had. Throw in my passion for writing and we've got something cooking there.

- Own a pub: Irish roots + Fondness of People + Love of delicious beers = Time to figure out how to run my own pub

- Learn how to play the guitar: see also mandolin or banjo. Yeah.

- Become a Dad: It's just something I always thought that I would be good at. Plus, forcing my son to become a left handed knuckleball pitcher thus greatening his shot at making the big leagues and becoming my gravy train on biscuit wheels is my sole retirement plan at this point in my young life.

- Compete in a triathlon

- Meet the boys in Pearl Jam: If any of you can assist me in this I will be forever grateful. Good god they're awesome.

- Live on an island: For at least a few years; would be nice to leave all this bullshit behind and just live.

8 Things that I say really often:

- The many different forms of the dang it. 1. Dang It = not good 2. Reverse Dang It = ayy!! alright 3. Tremendous Dang It = That will ruin your weekend 4. The Seldom heard Wicked Dang It = not too sure if anyone has survived that

- FANCY PLAY!!

- Not gonna lie to you...

- What it is Kool-Aid?!?!

- Oh Mama

- Drive fast, take chances: words to live by

- Jack-Pot: see Tommy Boy

- YAHTZEE!!

8 Books that I've read recently:

- The Rum Diary. HST

- A Confederacy of Dunces. John Kennedy Toole

- High Fidelity. Nick Hornsby

- Where the Sidewalk Ends. Shel Silverstein

- Hell's Angels. HST

- A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Douglas Adams

- Galapagos. Kurt Vonnegut

- The Gonzo Papers: Vol. 3: Songs of the Doomed: More Notes on the Death of the American Dream. HST

A lot of Hunter Thompson in there I know. Just have been on a kick lately.

8 Movies I've seen 8 times:

- "The Big Lebowski": My favorite flick out there.

- "Caddyshack": Bill Murray quite possibly at his best. Arguably, Rodney Dangerfield at his.

- "Young Frankenstein": Comedy gold!!

- "Anchorman": Pretty much has made me laugh harder than anything that I have ever seen

- "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas": Damn fine job of demonstrating the late Doctor of journalism.

- "The Empire Strikes Back": Fellow Star Wars nerds rejoice!!

- "You've Got Mail": I don't have to defend myself to you people.

- "Batman Begins": Christian Bale as Batman is the shit. Sorry Michael Keaton, you had a good run. The Toast is really looking forward to "The Dark Knight" when it comes out here in July.

- "Die Hard": Fucking Awesome!! Still to this very day. Sweet.

Virginia Beach Mutha-Fuckas!!!

So, the Corolla is all stocked and ready to roll for a sweet three plus hour drive down to Virginia Beach this afternoon. The Toast is tentatively set to take off from the office at about 3pm for a rendezvous with Kool-Aid at our Alexandria apartment to change into short pants and grab any last minute necessities (sunblock and road beers, I'm looking at you here).

Pretty much our plan for the weekend is simple:

- rise and shine, you're at the fuckin' beach...JACKPOT!!
- take advantage of liberal all-you-can-eat policy at hotel's continental breakfast
- look good in swimwear (dang dang!!)
- lie on beach, thoroughly enjoy recent purchase of HST's "The Rum Diary"
- prevent Toasted Irish skin sunburn w/ repeated sunblock applications (SPF 50 bitches!!)
- build elaborate sand castles with Target purchased sand toys (weeee!!!)
- run around and demonstrate frisbee skills for passers by
- check out Kool-Aid when she is not paying attention (it should be known that the Toast is always caught)
- locate nearest on-boardwalk ice cream distributor
- go out for night time eats, some drinks but let's not get crazy here
- rest easy Toast, you've had a tough one
- repeat
- spend Sunday hitting up awesome rides at beer themed amusement park (aces!!)

Basically I need this little respite of a vacation here, albeit kinda short. Work has been weird and oddly stressful of late and with the nonstop running around with rugby and standard day to day stuff this nice four day'er comes at the perfect time. Also, the Toast loves him some Rolley-Coasters and word on the street is that Busch Gardens is chock full o' them. I almost forgot, I'm spending a day plus in Colonial Williamsburg to boot. The History Major side of the Toast absolutely goes nuts for this shit.

And from what I hear from the Kool-Aid, this is to be our first REAL vacation together. I mean, we've gone places but each trip we take seems to have involved some sort of extraneous circumstances: either another couple (Little Crapper and Mary for Yanks weekend in NYC last summer), another family (Trip to see Ma Dukes in Chigago this past Jan.), or random weddings (i.e. friend's wedding in Albany last summer/her Brother's wedding in Vermont last fall). This one is all Kool-Aid and me. Not gonna lie to you; I like this idea and I'm excited to be a part of it.

So that's about it. Last minute rundown of items; book..check. sunglasses..check. beers and fruit to enhance on beach enjoyment..check. goofy cabana wear..check. kick-ass mix for drive down to VA beach..check. Attractive lady friend..check. Nice ass weather for a few days..check. Yep, everything certainly is coming up Casey. Enjoy the long weekend internet folks. Toast/Casey OUT!!!

Eat Shit Cancer!!!

Jon Lester threw a no-hitter for the Sox last night as they beat the Royals at Fenway 7-0 and it probably couldn't happen to a better person in the majors. Lester, only 24, has already had to go through so much in his young career and as the day goes on you folks out there will continually hear about his overcoming of non-Hodgkins lymphoma since being diagnosed just 21 months ago. Terry Francona probably has put it best though in one of his many responses to Lester's heroics last night:

"He's not just a good kid because he threw a no-hitter," Terry Francona said. "He's a good kid because he's a good kid."

Lester's No-No last night seems to begin to cement his knack for extraordinary events since his emotional return to playing ball. I mean, he won his first game back in that July night last summer in Cleveland, pitched the World Series clinching Game 4 last fall in Colorado, and finally culminating last night in a No-Hitter in front of a sold out Fenway Park and with the Red Sox Nation glued to their sets at home. The Lefty was consistantly throwing first pitch strikes and hitting 94, 95, even 96 mph with his fastball, showing tremendous command with all of his pitches walking only two (one in the ninth) and striking out a career high nine batters. Hell, he's beaten cancer. I think that can also be classified as extraordinary; don't you??

I came into the game last night at about the third inning or so following a trip to the gym and had it on in the background whilst I made some quite delicious chicken marsala. The game already pretty much at hand as the Sox were up 5-0 and we were greeted with a Varitek homer in the 6th as Kool-Aid and I sat down to eat some damn tasty bird. From there on out, Kool-Aid and I intenetly watched every pitch while the Fenway crowd remained standing until the final out in support of Lester.

But the moment of the evening came after Lester recorded the final out and after the traditional jumping all over the pitcher at the mound in celebration. As Lester began hugging his way through all of his teammates, he then came upon Manager Terry Francona and the two seemed to embrace each other as almost father and son. Tito went so far as to call Lester his son with a class that seems to be growing in Francona each day.

"This probably isn't fair to say, but I feel like my son graduated and my son threw a no-hitter," said Francona, whose son Nick had graduated from Penn earlier in the day, and who had grown close to Lester during his ordeal.

Francona continued: "To watch him do that tonight was beyond words. What a story. You feel like a proud parent. We're proud of him all the time but to watch him do that tonight was beyond words. I tried to put it into words but it's hard because -- what a story."

"It's something I'll remember for a long time," said Lester. "I've been through a lot the last couple of years. He's (Francona) been like a second dad to me, It was just a special moment right there. "He cares a lot about his players. It's not just about what you can do on the field."

Last night was something that Red Sox fans, and all baseball fans alike will cherish and talk about for some time to come. Just a few months after pitching the clinching game of the World Series, the cancer survivor Lester, who's still just a kid, goes out and pitches a no-hitter. Basically, its inspirational stuff for the ages. Today, the Toast feels good and so should you.

What are your Desert Island 5?

Ok, we all have them and since I'm not really in all that much of a writing mood, nor a thinking one, let's just see what five albums you'd have to have if stranded on a desert island. Special bonus points for any Phil Collins takers. Losers.

1. "The Bends", Radiohead
2. "London Calling", The Clash (Honorable Mention: "Sandinista")
3. "Quadrophenia", The Who
4. "Ten", Pearl Jam
5. "Stories from the City, Stories from the Sea", PJ Harvey

Shenanigans

Just a recap of random goings on. Have a good weekend.

- Radiohead completely dranched the shit out of me last sunday. Not once did the torrential downpour let up. Five hours of being cold and soaked to the core has rendered me ill the past few days. They still put on a pretty decent show especially when I was hit up with a little Karma Police and Fake Plastic Trees during the encore. However, it will always be remembered for the weather that was endured. Why Virginia...why??

- Nothing cures Friday afternoon boredom like a giant bag of peanut butter M&M's.

- Yesterday I kinda parked a little too close to a pickup on the street in front of my apartment. In response to this, the corrola was met with a note that simply said: "Fuck You"! Alright pal; take a look at yourself. Now give yourself an open handed slap to the mouth. You live in a large city with a high population and you've never been boxed in a tiny bit before. Grow up Peter Pan..Count Chocula.

- the other day Kool-Aid and I hit up a Chipper here in Old Town. Now this place, called Eamonn's, labeled itself as a true Dublin Chipper. Would a true Dublin Chipper serve you Guiness in a plastic cup?? For shame Eamonn's...for shame.

- I've been without internet at home since Sunday and after I strategically placed a call to tech support the earliest that they can send a tech to come get me back online and thus meet my daily at home internet needs is this Sunday morning at 9am. Fucking Comcast.

- Chef Boy-Ar-Dee is some pretty tasty shit and works wonders when you are in a pinch and need something for lunch, especially when it was purchased on sale so your pantry is loaded to the gills with Mr. Boy-Ar-Dee's finest. Today I had the mini ravioli's with meatballs. Absolutely Exquisite.

- I am attempting to win a go-kart in a at-work raffle for a company sponsored carnival that takes place on Sunday. This is me with my fingers crossed.

- Over the past few weeks I couldn't tell you the amount of ice cream that I have eaten. Kool-Aid and I have gone out for ice cream, both visiting places ranging from the corporate spectrum like Maggie Moo's to local favorites in The Dairy Godmother, or just eating a shitload of chipwiches and Ben and Jerry's at home. This recent trend does not bode well for beach season.

- Any film that features the incomperable Kurt Russell has its chances of being awesome increased at least three fold. Recent random Russell films viewed include:

"Death Proof" (which, of the Grindhouse flicks, was much better than "Planet Terror")

"The Thing" (A fucking classic)

"Tombstone" (Kilmer was the balls as Doc Holliday)

"Big Trouble in Little China" (Russell as Jack Burton: "When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the bar room wall, looks you crooked in the eye and asks you if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol' Jack Burton always says at a time like that: "Have ya paid your dues, Jack?" "Yessir, the check is in the mail.")

Dem shits is all sorts of bad ass!!

That's it, that's all, that's all there is. SHA-ZAMM!!

Oh....Hello There.

This morning I sort of took my sweet ass time getting moving prior to work. I stayed under the covers far longer than normal after my daily Kool-Aid wake up attempt. I rolled around and hid my head under the blankeys attempting to grasp five more minutes of sleepies. I contemplated shaving for a bit and just stood in front of the mirror before I just went ahead and made myself pretty for the day at the office. My typical shower time was extended three fold as I just didn't feel like getting out from underneath the ever so relaxing and soothing warmer than warm shower water. I debated for about 5 minutes on what shirt and pants combo I was going to choose to strut around in all day for the ladies (and some gentlemen) at the workplace. Because of this there did come a time in my daily routine that some things had to get skipped and that was, what rumor has, the most important thing of the day...a balanced breakfast.

Traditionally the Toast just grabs him a little lunch baggie full of frosted mini wheats and a bananna as he heads out the door for the morning commute to beautiful Bethesda. However, with Radiohead on Sunday night and the early part of the week chock full o' activity there has been no time to re-up on some breakfast supplies so this morning I just ran out the door with my laptop and gym bag and assumption that breakfast today would have to take a backseat to some skillful driving in order to make it to work "relatively" on time. About halfway into my journey I began to feel those hunger pangs that made me wish that I hadn't stayed in bed until it became absolutely necessary to get out from under the covers. I sort of wished that I hadn't contemplated shaving for those precious minutes, extended my shower time three fold, or even debated internally for that spot of time on what stupid work clothes to wear and instead just threw on what ever was clean or whatever was next in the standard Toast work-wear rotation. I was damn hungry and at this point there was nothing that I could really do about it.

So I walked into my building not eating the bananna that I normally would from the walk to the parking lot to the front door. I began to approach the section of our office suite where my particular office is located without the baggie of mini wheats that I am accustomed to take down with my morning coffee while I check email and any blog activity. I turn on the light in my office after opening the door and I go to fetch my laptop out of my bag when I see what could only be seen as a gift from the heavens above placed strategically where my lappy is rested daily. What is this fanciest of plays you ask?? Well...simply put, a shmuffin.


Normally I would have preferred a crossantz but one in my situation cannot be a begger nor a chooser and sometimes you just can't get what you want but you just might find that you get what you need. Oh...blessed are you Sheetz customers that I work with. The Toast is certainly over joyed to have you in the office. Now, if you'll excuse me, this shmuffin is not going to take care of itself.

"You have not been..Paying Attention"

I'm going to see fucking Radiohead; I almost forgot!! It just plain ol' slipped my mind but the Toast and a bevy of assorted ladies and gents get to go check out Radiohead this weekend. Kinda wish it wasn't a Sunday evening show as I have a big, day long pow-wow of a meeting downtown on Monday at 8AM. Can't call in sick to that one I'm afraid. Maybe I'll just tell all dem co-workers I hopped on the wrong metro. Hopefully Kool-Aid can still do that killer metro operator impression.

"Please stand back..doors open on the left." oooh.....(fingers crossed)

You'd have thought that with all of the trouble that went into getting these seats I'd be a little more aware of the goings on. I just hope that I am able to walk on Sunday as us rugby boys have our final game of the spring season on Saturday afternoon and it can come no sooner as I am already having a heap of trouble walking around. Just looking forward to a bit o' rest I suppose. Now where I was I? Oh yeah. RADIOHEAD...WOOO!!!!

"I learned fried chicken at the school of hard knocks."

The Toast is an awfully busy man and because of this fact I miss a ton of shit: i.e. birthdays, frequent bat mitzfahs, proper restroom breaks, the McRib for a limited time only, and most importantly, popular music and television. Now, sometimes this isn't such a bad thing, American Idol I'm looking your way on this one. But every once in a while being a man about town with two hundred things to do will cause you to miss some of the worth whiles out there. Good thing that technology has a way to get around some of these instances.

About two weeks ago the Toast made himself a nice little purchase from Amazon; that being the first season of "30 Rock" on DVD. Now, I had experienced this show a few times before but had never really given it the proper attention that a show of this magnitude requires. We'll blame the Thursday evening rugby practices for my lack of devotion..and all the sports watching and drinking that can also take up my highly precious time. Now, from what I had seen previous to this clutch buy I had found particularly hilarious so this wasn't one of those impulse grabs that we Toasts are known for; plus it had a little bit of Tina Fey, which is never gonna hurt nerds like me.

Well, ever since this online purchase I have been sucking down episodes of "30 Rock" like dino nuggets. Presently I am two dvd's down with one to go and when I run out, its all tremendous dang it for this guy as I'm going to have to wait and watch episodes one week at a time like some sort of chump. No idea what I am going to do then. Anywho, the interactions between the head writer character Fey and the eccentric executive character Alec Baldwin are priceless and really make the show. One of my favorites includes Jack Donaghy (Baldwin) explaining to Liz Lemon (Fey) why he can't get rid of the beeper he bought from her beeper salesman boyfriend: "I can't. I'm expecting a call from 1983." Fuck it, any time Baldwin is on the screen you're most likely about to see something funny. I'll add a case in point here in a few, if I have internet at home that is.

**sidenote**I fucking hate comcast and their ability to have non-working internet service about 67% of the time.

Realistically there are so many other portions of the show that make it great, especially when this seems to be a time in which there are few comedies on television even worth my time (opinion of course). From the fact that Fey's character spends half of the episodes talking about food (sandwiches!) and getting drunk, to frequent hilarious guest spots like Will Arnett (GOB) as Donaghy's homosexual archnemesis, a surprisingly hilarious version of Tracy Morgan, multiple references to star wars which is always comedy gold for it's nerd like fan base, and that flashback humor that pops up every now and then which appeals to the no attention span side of me, this show has got it working in all the right spots. It's entertaining, smart, chock full o' hilarious writing, great supporting cast, and hits you with stuff that makes you think or the quick Donaghy one liner. It's pretty safe to say that: "I love me this show so much, I want to take "30 Rock" behind the middle school, and get it pregnant."


**Update**
To go with my Donaghy talk from earlier

Kickass albums of my younger days: Live's "Throwing Copper"

The Toast loves music, dig?? Also, the Toast grew up during the grunge era of music so it should be known that I am far more experienced in picking out fucking awesome beats than about 83% of the rest of the internet. So the Toastedblog staff here has decided to go ahead and put together I nice little recurring post type thing that goes back and references all of the kick ass shit that I grew up with, took chances during my teenage years with, and still to this day rock fairly regularly. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you, KICKASS ALBUMS OF MY YOUNGER DAYS.

Seems weird that I start off a segment about kickass music with a post dedicated to a Live album as the past few years and albums have not done much for the "rockin'" cred (I mean, have you listed to one of their latest "Songs of Black Mountain"?), but back in the early and mid 90's this band knew how to get shit done. And I'm not talking about songs like "Lightning Crashes", which is a little mushy for all the teen angst I was ridden with. I'm talking about rockin' tunes like "Iris" and "White, Discussion", and fucking "Stage". Even when they had songs that were about to hit you with some feelings, they kinda rocked (see "I Alone" below).

It's easier not to be wise
And measure these things by your brains
I sank into eden with you
Alone in the church by and by

I'll read to you here, save your eyes
You'll need them, your boat is at sea
Your anchor is up, youve been swept away
And the greatest of teachers wont hesitate
To leave you there, by yourself,
Chained to fate

I alone love you
I alone tempt you
I alone love you
Fear is not the end of this!

It's easier not to be great
And measure these things by your eyes
We long to be here by his resolve
Alone in the church by and by
To cradle the baby in space
And leave you there by yourslef
Chained to fate

Oh, now, we took it back too far,
Only love can save us now, all these riddles that you burn
All come runnin back to you, all these rhythms that you hide
Only love can save us now, all these riddles that you burn
Yeah, yeah, yeah

I know what you're saying: "You're kidding me right??". and it's true, a lot of their lyrics are a bit preachy and, in times, kinda corny. But in the end, these York, PA boys were able to pull it off. At times I don't know why or how really and if I had the ability to get onto youtube here at the office you can give it a ganders yourself and you too internet reader will see why. After all is said and done though, a teenaged Toast could just throw this album on and rock his "problems" away. "Throwing Copper" should and will continue to be cranked up to 11.

We're Re-Listing Dang Its People!!

This past saturday had the Toast traveling up Baltymore way as my rugby team was slated to play in a day long tournament known by the locals as the North Bay Cup. Day long tournaments are great. You just hang out all day and play fucking rugby, that's it. The only problem with it is...you just hang out all day and play fucking rugby. And when I say all day, I mean all. day. long. Our first match of the day started at 10:30am and by the time we had completed taking the final game and winning the tournament it was 8:00pm.

We're talking four full games of rugby people...all in one day on a field that was so hard that it felt like playing on a poorly paved parking lot; every time you hit the deck you felt it. So, needless to say that I am still a little worse for the wear; banged up if you will. Not gonna lie to you my lovely internet readers, the Toast is straight up whiny. Presently I'm featuring a laundry list of injuries and such that has me all hop-along here at the office this morning and getting met with questions of if I'm ok and inquiries wondering what I really do with my weekends.

A quick rundown of what ails me:
-I dislocated the ring finger on my right hand
-twisted my previously bum wheel, right knee has a bit more trouble than the everyday trouble it normally has and is used to
-inability to fully straighten my right arm or lift it any higher than my shoulder
-when attempting to look from side to side I must keep my head straight as my neck won't allow simple movements, basically, I turn around like a superhero (i.e. batman sans cape)
-a pretty fierce scrape and deep bruise the size of a five pound ham on my left hip to go along with the dozen others per aforementioned field conditions

Also, at one point I had to take a minute for the first time ever playing rugby in result of a hit. I've never really had to do that before. Basically taking a minute in rugby is exactly what it sounds like. Rugby, like soccer, has a the clock continuously running and spot subs are not made. So, following the hit, and I mean I was absolutely blasted a few seconds following a pass that I made, I had the wind knocked completely out of me and spent a minute or two just gathering myself while taking a knee. From then on out, I spent the remainder of the game looking for a window of opportunity to line up the party responsible for the cheap shot. Kool-Aid has since done her best in these dire times by giving me the back rub that pretty much blows all other back rubs out of the water last night. She can be awful fierce when it comes to fixing all of the man-friend's rugby related back issues. "Oh mama...hurts so good" was all that could be said.

With all that complaining thrown out at you, let me get to the good stuff. We did end up winning this tournament in North Bay and we looked pretty good doing so, aside from our second match of the day against a team from Brooklyn; the team we ended up meeting again and defeating in the finals. By the time I got back home after a few beers at the post-tourney drink up it was shortly after 10pm and Kool-Aid was there waiting with some frozen pizza (JACKPOT!!) following her day at a horse race with her lady pals called the Gold Cup. And I also got to take in another viewing of one of my faves, "28 Days Later" (Two words, FUCK. and YES.). 2/3rds a frozen pizza after a long day of rugby and a sweet Danny Boyle flick to go with it, that's going to scratch you right where you itch.

This tournament pretty much signals the end of the spring rugby season as we only have a week left of practice and a friendly match against a superleague team down here in DC this coming weekend. Not really looking forward to the end of the season but it will give me some spare time for my other awesome tasks and pursuits: ultimate frisbee, teaching kool-aid how to golf, getting some hiking in, continuing my struggle in learning how to play tennis, etc. Plus, the ice hockey league that I am in has just started up again for the summer so I'll have that to look forward to. Don't worry about me folks, there's plenty to get up for. Whoop Whoop!!

"Right near da beach..BOY-eee!!"

Currently the Toast is doing a nice bit of planning as a scheduled trip is in the works. That's right kids...Kool-Aid and the Toast are beach bound as a weekend in Virginia Beach is all the rage and the haps for Memorial Day. Word on the street is that we're looking at taking off on Thursday afternoon putting us down in Virginia Beach hopefully by the early evening, all primed for hitting up a nice seafood joint so I can get my crab eatin' on. Throw in a day and a half at Busch Gardens with the rolleycoasters and this seems to have the makings of a nice little long weekend here.

In preparation I have been spending a bit of time researching Virginia Beach online just to get an idea on what to expect as I have yet to head down that-a-ways as I am still in the infancy stage of my Virginia residency. All in all it's none to shabby but I guess I'd be saying that about any vacation resort type place that plans to feature Kool-Aid primarily bikini-clad. Rolleycoasters, seafood, beach time'in, Kool-Aid in provacative attire..looks like everything is coming up Casey!! ACES!

Early on today all that I pretty much understood about the Virginia Beach area is that it features a boardwalk and our hotel is on the ocean front. Yup...that's it, there's a beach to lie on. You know what that means, burnt Toast..HA! Anywho, following a bit of poking around, I have discovered that it is a richly historic area (as most in Virginia are, or at least seem to be) and that it is surpisingly well populated. I thought that it was just going to be some high class, but smaller beach community. Nowhere did I invision what Wikipedia told me; 435,000 people with hundreds of hotels and miles of beaches...what's the deal??

In any event, this little getaway should be a damn good time. A couple days of relaxing on the beach, maybe take in a few of the local sites, and surprisingly, have my first trip with Koo-Aid to a theme park. Who's the big winner?? This guy!!

**As a special bonus today I have just been informed that Kool-Aid has acquired three of the Toast's unofficial second favorite treat (the white chocolate macadamia nut cookie) from some function at her office. If there is no hill running at rugby practice tonight I will most assuredly rest easy this evening as today has truly made me the king of kings.