Help Me Big Baby Jitters. You're my only hope!!

For those who know the toast, we notice he has a thing for sports. I love to watch 'em. I mean, who wouldn't?? There is nothing like getting together with a group of your good friends and watch a good day of football with beers and wingies, meeting out at a bar for big Monday once NCAA Basketball gets underway, night after night going nuts for playoff baseball, the Superbowl, going and watching Boeheim work his magic, whew.....and I'm not even close to being done. More importantly, I love playing them. I've played hockey since I was a wee lad and do still today, went to minor league catcher camp, been playing rugby and loving every minute of it, and I was even nominated for the Heisman Trophy (Nutrocker!!). However, for the first time in my sport enjoying life, I am playing organized basketball by joining a city rec. league team. Now, I know the game of basketball. I've played it while growing up, will play pick up games with friends every now and then; all that good stuff. Organized basketball, I have no idea what the hell I am doing. The Change O' Pacer's (my team, named after our sponsor, the wonderful sports bar the Change of Pace) had our first game last night. Jitter, this is where you come in. Chicken wing pizza and classic over-strohs shall be your reward.

Jitter, or (JT), is a "rather large American" living in the far off reaches of the great European country of Portugal. Originally from Mansfield, OH (which he aptly nicknamed Landfill), he is a man that has brought much to the toast and the rest of my fellow companions. He alone has helped coin phrases that you and I use every day. Try to think of what your day would be like if you couldn't yell "dang it" when something just doesn't go your way, or shouting "fancy play" when you come across a PBR special at the Bridge Street Tavern. We owe our "yahtzee's", "owwww...'s", and "all of it higher's" to that Counting Crows listenin', blatz drinkin', and bird lovin' Ohio native. I mean, without our Uncle Jitter, I may not know of the wonders of Big K soda, Card Sharks, Ma Jitters late night casey-dilla feast and Modon-YO!! He even introduced a completely sloshed Toast to Bill Jitters at 3 in the morning during Chigago weekend!! At 6'11", he is officially the tallest person I know. That height has given him many advantages that us 5'11" folk were never presented, one of those being the ability to play professional basketball in a foreign and beautiful setting. That is why I come to him now.

The Change O' Pacers need a ringer. We got absolutely pummeled by a group of middle aged lawyers in our basketball game last night. The Pacer's need you to come home as soon as possible and return this struggling team to the glory we once held. Only you can show us the ropes of the International game. Teach us how to not step out of bounds 3 times in one game while bringing the ball up the court and improve our shooting so that we don't need to hit the backboard to have any chance of the ball going in. We need help boxing out, playing stand up defense, and controlling the flow of the game. More importantly, we need a tall guy who's good at basketball to win all of our games for us. Please say that you're in. Fly to the States so you can join us on Tuesday nights for city rec. league ball. While you're at it, bring Javen and Danny back. We've got jerseys waiting.

In other toasted news, our rugby team destroyed in the playoffs beating Genesee in the semi's and taking out Rochester in the finals for our third state title in a row. We came out ready to play and just rolled. Also, I don;t think that I have drank as much as I did this past weekend in quite some time. Chigago weekend beats the amount of beer I had but other than that, we've got some searching to do. I really should devote an entire entry to get the full effect of my drunkeness. A sense a future toasted tale!!!

Finally, I was to publish a blog yesterday that dealt with some toasted thoughts on the election with it cleverly titled "I used to work with the Pentagon, now I help you get your chicken on." Oh, this detailed the toppling of the Bush administration by the Democratic John Kerry and Dubya's impending journey of discovery as a tremendous cog in the rotisserie chicken industry, just like the Gambler. Oh well: "Bad Chicken!! Mess You Up!!"