He asked us: "Be you angels??" And we said: "Nay; We are but men. ROCK!"

Over the years I have noticed something very prominant about who I am and I have been in a neverending goofy grin mode my entire life because of it. But what is it?? What could effect Toast this way?? Is it the joy of helping others?? How about quenching the ever thirsting need for knowledge?? The love that you get from family?? Hmmm.....all of these are great answers and they are in my life but not what puts that hop in my step everyday. So Toast, what's going on here and where are you going with this?? Well, funny you should ask that because I was about to share. Nothing is more of a reverse dang it in this world......than being a dude.

Ok, before we get started here, let me first explain that this is nothing against you ladies, y'all are top notch!! So, just that we understand and are all on the same table, I am not taking anything away from you ladies. But honestly, being a dude, not bad times at all. Think about it, whether the reason is as simple as being able to open all of your own jars and ESPN or as complex as the ability to say things like: "wow, my balls sure do hurt" and not worrying about what other people think, being a guy has its advantages. Movie nudity is virtually always female, you know stuff about tanks, if you see a guy at the bar with the same shirt on you might just become buddies for life, underwear comes conviniently in three packs for $10, and most importantly, you get to jump up and slap stuff. I've never had my butt be a factor in job interviews (although in all honesty, my butt would get me the job and that big promotion) and outside of playing the game, a guy in a hockey mask never has tried to attack me. People don't really glance at my chest when they talk to me, I can be showered and ready to go in 10 minutes, and if something mechanical doesn't work, fixing it is a snap because I get to bash it with a hammer and throw it across the room. Weddings are easy for us for there is no need to hunt like crazy for the perfect dress due to the $75. tuxedo rental. Not to mention, bachelor parties womp on bridal showers. I think I may be rambling. This was all supposed to start as a tribute to some dudes I know, without giving their blogs shameless plugs like amatuer stripper websites on Howard Stern and I was going to talk about my weekend a little bit, instead I present the above passage. I have de-railed and I will now move on.

I know Dane Cook would appreciate this next story, well not so much a story but just a statement of a few collective facts from portions of my weekend. Friday night I went to a bar to watch the SU game. Knowing that I had to be up and on the road at 5:30 am I tried to make it an early night but beer has a way of getting a hold of me from time to time so I ended up with a nice happy beer buzz and home by 11:30 pm. Well, I think the number of Sam Adams' consumed by the Toast effected his ability to hear 5 am alarms because I didn't wake up till ten after six. I had the immediate I'm late feeling as I woke and then flew out the door and into my car and did 80 the entire way down through the back roads to Elmira and Corning. What was to be a 2 hour drive was completed in one hour and twenty two minutes and I arrived at my referee seminar three whole minutes early. Waking up late so I don't have time to stop for egg mcmuffins, no thank you, spending my entire Saturday down in fucking Corning in a classroom and skating while not playing any hockey, yes...please??? I also got some rugby playing in this weekend when I received a call at 10:30 on Sunday morning from my rugby teammate's Brad (aka Louganis due to his swimming background) and Schee (short for Scheemaker, his last name). We had a pick up game at 2 pm and played for a few hours. Great to be playing after a few weeks off. What wasn't great was taking an errant shot to the boys and forgetting to throw that area's protective gear in my gym bag. I think I threw up in my mouth after that incident and hopefully baby making is still possible cause I have a baseball team to field and coach in my adult years. We are currently accepting applications for assistant coach and team trainer. Please include references and head shots.

Ok, I am all over the place here. Word on the street is that Dan Banazek (shameless blog plug) is coming into town for turkey day. Does this mean that Toastie has a partner in crime for drive to Schenectady to see Javen, Fun-ford, and the Siena Saints as they take on Syracuse. I certainly hope so. Danny, think about all of the fast food possibilities that can be had on the way out. I think I remember driving past a Popeyes.....or was it Roy Rogers. In any event, they have Burger King's and I seem to recall you eating multiple whoppers as you slugged giant coffees on your lunch breaks late on Sunday afternoon, you know, before we all headed out to the Change Of Pace for delicious wingies and $1 drafts of Labatts. Ooh ooh, and drunk talk, sweet beautiful drunk talk. By the way, in case you don't check your email, they play at 1pm on Saturday and I shall wear all of my Craiggy McThunder gear. (he's so handsome, and awesome) Or at least purchase/manufacture some. Please return your wrist bands to their ROCK IT positions. Javen, I shall leave Friday, get the Schaefers ready!! And the popcorn balls. I'll bring the chicken wing pizza!! Owww!!!!